{"id":1156,"date":"2011-11-16T08:50:37","date_gmt":"2011-11-16T13:50:37","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/tedkrever.com\/blog\/?p=1156"},"modified":"2011-11-16T12:18:26","modified_gmt":"2011-11-16T17:18:26","slug":"shower-wisdom-chapter-one","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/tedkrever.com\/blog\/2011\/11\/16\/shower-wisdom-chapter-one\/","title":{"rendered":"Shower Wisdom, Chapter One"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"http:\/\/tedkrever.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/11\/old-fashioned-shower21.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft size-full wp-image-1158\" title=\"old-fashioned-shower2\" src=\"http:\/\/tedkrever.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/11\/old-fashioned-shower21.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"200\" height=\"288\" \/><\/a>It&#8217;s been my conviction for a long time that whoever invented the shower should be given the Nobel Peace Prize.<\/p>\n<p>If I could chart the growth of my knowledge of human beings and particularly my own quirky little self, I have a feeling a good 70-80% of that knowledge came inside or just stepping out of the shower.<\/p>\n<p>Drying off counts, too.<\/p>\n<p>So this is the first installment in Shower Wisdom. Unless I drop dead in the next week, I expect there will be more.<\/p>\n<p>I&#8217;m in a relationship (she&#8217;s not &#8211; she&#8217;s dating me &#8211; but I&#8217;m in a relationship). We saw each other last night and I noticed on the way home that while, when we&#8217;re together, I feel liberated and free; when we&#8217;re apart, I feel more draggy and weighed down than I do when I&#8217;m single. Which isn&#8217;t a good thing, obviously.<\/p>\n<p>And what occurred to me this morning in the shower (naturally) is how alone I felt. Really empty alone, letting the water pour over me and trying to prepare for the workday. Desolate alone.<\/p>\n<div id=\"attachment_1160\" style=\"width: 210px\" class=\"wp-caption alignleft\"><a href=\"http:\/\/tedkrever.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/11\/frameless-shower-doors.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-1160\" class=\"size-full wp-image-1160\" title=\"frameless-shower-doors\" src=\"http:\/\/tedkrever.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/11\/frameless-shower-doors.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"200\" height=\"298\" \/><\/a><p id=\"caption-attachment-1160\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">modern fancy shower (not mine)<\/p><\/div>\n<p>A man can work up an awful lot of negative energy from a feeling like that. And I have, any number of times over the years.<\/p>\n<p>When I&#8217;ve been single, as in most of recent history, my walls are up. No one gets in, nothing gets out that\u2019s uncomfortable. I live comfortably inside a narrow space that I carry around with me. The Geodesic Dome of Ted.<\/p>\n<p>I&#8217;m out of the dome now. I&#8217;m in the world again. I&#8217;m seeing the steam rise off the subway exits and hearing the birds rustle in the branches before they take off. A world of precious grueling oddball details to share &#8211; and a vibrant, brilliant spirit to share them with.<\/p>\n<p>But that openness comes at the price of being confronted with myself alone, and all the fear and disturbia that carries with it.<\/p>\n<p>When the world gets bigger, the self has to grow to fit. I&#8217;ve done this before, stretching the membrane. I&#8217;m doing it again, right now.<\/p>\n<p>A good shower helps.<\/p>\n<p>Correction: I have been informed by Smitty, the party in question, that I am misinforming you above. &#8216;I am NOT just dating you&#8230;I am commuting to Staten Island as a sign of my dedication to being in your presence.&#8217; Anyone who lives in a more civilized locale (just about anywhere this side of Sumatra &#8211; oops, my apology to those of you now penning outraged replies from Sumatra) will understand what a serious\u00a0commitment\u00a0that is. One for which I am very grateful.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<!-- AddThis Advanced Settings generic via filter on the_content --><!-- AddThis Share Buttons generic via filter on the_content -->","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>It&#8217;s been my conviction for a long time that whoever invented the shower should be given the Nobel Peace Prize. If I could chart the growth of my knowledge of human beings and particularly my own quirky little self, I <span class=\"excerpt-dots\">&hellip;<\/span> <a class=\"more-link\" href=\"https:\/\/tedkrever.com\/blog\/2011\/11\/16\/shower-wisdom-chapter-one\/\"><span class=\"more-msg\">Continue reading &rarr;<\/span><\/a><!-- AddThis Advanced Settings generic via filter on get_the_excerpt --><!-- AddThis Share Buttons generic via filter on get_the_excerpt --><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"_uf_show_specific_survey":0,"_uf_disable_surveys":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[7,48,1],"tags":[10,13,9],"class_list":["post-1156","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-everything-else","category-mind-power","category-uncategorized","tag-lovers","tag-real-life","tag-words"],"aioseo_notices":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/tedkrever.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1156","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/tedkrever.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/tedkrever.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tedkrever.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tedkrever.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1156"}],"version-history":[{"count":9,"href":"https:\/\/tedkrever.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1156\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1173,"href":"https:\/\/tedkrever.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1156\/revisions\/1173"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/tedkrever.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1156"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tedkrever.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1156"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tedkrever.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1156"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}