![\"\"](\"http:\/\/tedkrever.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/06\/hopper.nighthawks.jpg\" "\\"hopper.nighthawks\\"")
<\/a>He shrugged. He had a way of shrugging with both shoulders, kind of a time delay, a sequence. Over the years, I\u2019d even tried on occasion to keep track\u2014did one particular shoulder start the sequence? based on specific occasions? on specific types of emotion? We\u2019d been through so much together\u2026but I\u2019d never been able to pin it down.<\/p>\n\u201cWhat are you going to do?\u201d I asked, idly. It wasn\u2019t like I had anything useful to offer.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat can I do? I\u2019ll put out resumes.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI did. It wasn\u2019t that long ago\u2014\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI remember.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI had to find a whole new business.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cIt\u2019s true,\u201d he conceded, \u201cbut we\u2019re not that young anymore. In this economy, you don\u2019t know who\u2019s going to want you.\u201d<\/p>\n
Silence. The waitress brought his coffee. We\u2019d been meeting at the diner long enough that we didn\u2019t order anymore. They knew us, they knew what we took. They made me my tea\u2014they kept honey behind the counter and cut lemon slices for me even though no one else used them.<\/p>\n
We sat comfortably in silence. I didn\u2019t know that many people I could do that with.<\/p>\n
\u201cTwo years today,\u201d I said finally.<\/p>\n
\u201cI know\u2014I knew it as soon as I woke up this morning. I didn\u2019t wake up and then know it\u2014it was already in me when I woke up.\u201d<\/p>\n
My turn to shrug, but I always did it the same way.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou never know who\u2019s going to want you, ever,\u201d I said.<\/p>\n
He smiled. \u201cThat\u2019s what put us here.\u201d He tapped the table. I nodded. I remembered the both of us in black suits with wet cheeks. You don\u2019t think of a diner as a house of solace. A church maybe, a bar maybe. Not a diner. But it was for us.<\/p>\n
\u201cShe would have had an idea for you,\u201d I told him flat-out. \u201cShe would have had a plan in about three seconds.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cShe had energy to burn, that\u2019s sure,\u201d he said. A mischievous smile crossed his face now and every time I saw that smile, I couldn\u2019t help but see it through her eyes. I hated it at first, seeing him that way, seeing what must have attracted her to him, those mischievous eyes. But I had to admit: if I\u2019d been a woman, I\u2019d have been drawn in too.<\/p>\n
\u201cI would never have approached you, you know that,\u201d he said and I thought it was funny, for him to have finally told me that, after two years.<\/p>\n
\u201cI know,\u201d I nodded. \u201cI know you well enough by now. You were discreet.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI wanted what she had to give me. She made it clear you came first. You were her life. She just had more\u2014\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cLet\u2019s\u2014leave it there,\u201d I said, my heart in my throat all of a sudden. Two years later. I looked him in the eye so I knew he understood what I was saying. \u201cWe\u2019re okay, you and I. We pretty much have been from the beginning. When I saw you at the funeral, I knew. It\u2019s why I introduced myself here. Once she\u2019s dead, what\u2019s the difference?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cIt\u2019s kept her alive,\u201d he said. \u201cWe don\u2019t have to talk about her. When we\u2019re sitting here together\u2014\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYeah,\u201d I said, clipped. And then, \u201cyeah\u201d again, like it meant something different the second time.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat about that girl you were seeing?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cShe was nice. Nothing wrong with her.\u201d I stirred the tea, moved the honey around until the water got dark, more intense, until the lemon would bite into the honey, until the taste would make me pucker. They knew how I wanted it here. \u201cBut I think I\u2019m better on my own. Whenever I get around another woman\u2014\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThere\u2019s a hole.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYeah.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cShe was a great girl. You were a lucky guy.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWe both were.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYeah,\u201d he nodded. \u201cYou buying?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cIt\u2019s my turn,\u201d I said. They never charged us anymore anyway. He smiled and took off. I kept stirring my tea, watching the color deepen.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
He was late arriving. He usually isn\u2019t late. \u201cWhat happened?\u201d \u201cThey decided we needed a staff meeting to perk us up. Our sales are in the tank, the client\u2019s probably going to replace us, which means they\u2019ll lay most of …<\/span> Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"_uf_show_specific_survey":0,"_uf_disable_surveys":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[68],"class_list":["post-643","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-writing","tag-short-story"],"aioseo_notices":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/tedkrever.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/643","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/tedkrever.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/tedkrever.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tedkrever.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tedkrever.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=643"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/tedkrever.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/643\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":646,"href":"https:\/\/tedkrever.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/643\/revisions\/646"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/tedkrever.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=643"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tedkrever.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=643"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tedkrever.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=643"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}